Broken Noses!

One question sets me off.

The question usually comes up in social situations when someone finds out I teach martial arts.

It comes from guys who sit in bars, drink beer, and watch Conner McGregor while secretly thinking they can beat him.

They also like pro wrestling.

A lot.

They ask:

“Do you spar?”

I answer: “Do you?”

“No; but I want to. I’m looking for a new gym”.  

     - That’s the funny thing about these guys - they are always looking for a NEW gym. Ask them what’s wrong with the old one and they all say the same thing…:

“Because WE didn’t spar enough.”

I say: “What is your favorite technique?”

Answer: “Uhh … err, I’m not sure. When I spar we get broken noses. Do you guys get broken noses?”.

     … Welcome to my private hell.  

Some days I wished I sold vacuums.

---

The guys that ask this question are living in a dream.

I’m not saying that injuries don’t happen. But injury is always accidental and rare.

These guys remember a brief time years ago when they trained somewhere. Over time the memory becomes like a snowball rolling down a hill. It picks up more and more detail. They start to remember details that NEVER actually happened.

That’s why they need a NEW gym. No gym is ever good enough for the their fantasy.

But at least I’ve learned to handle the awkwardness. When the question comes I deftly switch subjects.

     “So what do you think of Hulk Hogan coming back for a 9th world title?”

    ...Works every time.

---

Here's the practical answer to the sparring question.

Yes. You need to spar. It’s essential.

But it’s important to know what sparring is.

Sparring: Any type of training done with a partner where both of your goals are OPPOSING each other in the short term. This includes free rolling, sticky hands, randori, and levels of contact that range from point sparring to heavy contact with special equipment.

Sparring is not the same thing as fighting. Fighting involves personalities and egos.

Sparring is about working against your partner to make you both better long term.

But here’s the important thing.

Sparring is NOT something a dojo does or doesn’t do.

It’s something YOU do.

Sparring is about creating relationships. These relationships are earned.  It's the people you create relationships with that will trust you enough to let you choke them out or try and punch them in the face.

Relationships are earned on the mats. Sometimes while training on the them. Sometimes while sweeping them.

Sparring is like staying late to help clean. "We" don't do it. Only a handful of dedicated students do. But it's also usually those people who end up doing most of the sparring.

---

As a teacher I can I can make sure the mindset is right in the dojo. But I can’t create relationships of respect for you.

You must create them for yourself. 

Over time; after you’ve earned the respect of some of the other students, you say: “Hey; do you want to stay after class on Wednesday and spar?”

You stay. They stay. You spar. 

Who knows. Maybe these little regular interactions could bloom into a class?

Maybe one night I’ll stay and watch.

Maybe even help.

The Wrong Room Will Kill You.

Don't let the wrong room kill you!

Each week you've got to find yourself in two different rooms if you want success:

Room 1 is where you LEAD.

Room 2 is where you GROW.

These rooms are very different. In Room 1 you are the best. Being the best puts you in charge. It feels good to be in charge.

Room 1 also gives you an opportunity to give.

But if you spend too much time in room 1 it will corrupt you. You will become like so many of our leaders and politicians.

To be successful you’ve got to spend time in the other room. In room 2 you are likely the worst. Room 2 is filled with people who are better than you. But it’s in room 2 that you grow.

Most people live their lives in only ONE of those rooms. The corrupt spend their lives in room 1. The meek spend their lives in room 2.

The corrupt and the meek always fail.

---

I’ve taught martial arts professionally for over thirty years. During that time I’ve seen my share of ups and downs. Looking back I can tell you what caused the ups. I can also tell you what caused the downs.

Now that I know the cause I can tell you how to avoid the downs.

Here’s how it works.

When you start to learn something new you are in room 2. There will be a lot of others who are better than you there. In room 2 you will be uncomfortable. You might even be frustrated.

But if you’re mindful you will notice that even during the discomfort and frustration… you are growing! In room 2 your income will grow, your health will improve, your relationships get better.

But here’s what happens. Eventually you grow strong and begin to master the teachings in room 2. Eventually YOU become the leader. It feels good to be leader. It’s cushy and warm. Like a womb.

When the room you are in gets really comfortable it becomes room 1. Room 2 over time always BECOMES room 1!

Being in room 1 IS important. You’ve got to spend time each week being a leader. You are adding value and helping others.

Spending time in room 1 also prevents you from becoming meek.

But when you lead you are no longer growing. You are feeding others but not yourself. Pretty soon you won’t have anything more to give. You will begin to fail.

Some people stuck in room 1 turn to corruption. (Lying, cheating, manipulation.)

Other people stuck in room 1 turn to quasi religion. (As in: “Oh look at how spiritual I am - I’m ABOVE personal growth.”)

Either way a leader with nothing to give always begins to rot. A rotting leader always comes up with clever ways to hide the smell.

---

As a lifetime martial arts teacher I can tell you the temptation to stay in room 1 is strong. But the best days of my career have been when I struggled.

Being in room 2 is expensive. The follower is the one who pays. You don’t always pay with money but you always pay with effort and sacrifice. If you are in a room and not paying you are not in room 2.

But the one who pays is always the one who grows.

---

Spend time around people that are smarter, wealthier, and more disciplined. Room 2 is where your heros hang out.

In the world of Martial Arts many of us don’t want to move into room 2. It’s easier to create “titles” and “ranks”.

But if you don’t spend time in room 2 your followers lose their respect for you.

I can always tell when I haven’t spent enough time in room 2. My students look for better teachers during those times. And you know what? They deserve them.

I don’t have to always improve my skill as a martial artist to get into room 2. I’ve spent the last year or two learning to write. If you saw how long it used to take me to create a post a year ago you would be amazed. I’ve really grown.

If you saw how much I’m struggling to get this on the page right now you would know which room I’m still in.

I’m growing in other areas too.

Every week I spend time in a real room with people who are better than me. People who are smarter. People who make more money. People who live in bigger and better houses. People with bigger influence and better relationships.

Sometimes it hurts. But when it hurts I know I’m in the right place.

When it hurts I know I’m on the way UP.

And now you know how to be on the way UP too!

Pouring Water On Your Campfire

Poverty is an awful thing.

Poverty is like pouring water on a fire. When it’s around you can hear the hiss and see the smoke of lack.

Poverty perpetuates itself. The poorer you get the poorer you get. Pretty soon you make the people around you poor too. That’s the reason you have poor neighborhoods. Everyone’s poor because they keep passing the negative energy back and forth.

That’s also why you have rich neighborhoods.

I’ve lived both places. I recommend the rich ones.

Poverty is a payment. Wealth is a donation.

I have a friend who I donate to regularly. I love giving him money. I send the money even when I don’t use the service. That’s because the money I pay is to support my friend.

It’s a gift.

I asked my friend the other day to support something. (Not to give money) But to give attention to a simple idea. My friend said “no”; he didn’t even want to consider it. He was afraid it might lead to another payment.

Pshhhhhhhhh….shhhhhhh….!!!

I felt the energy of poverty. It was like he had poured water on a burning fire when he spoke. I felt the wealth energy leave him.

Then I felt my own resistance too. I thought for a brief moment: “Maybe I should withdraw my donation to him. After all, he’s not doing his part for me.”

Pshhhhhhhhhh….pshhhhhhhh..,.! ! More energy being pulled from the fire.

I know the feeling of the energy leaving the fire. I know it from decades of poverty growing up.

Because I know the energy of poverty I know how to deal with it.

Only one way. Head on.

You’ve got to pour fuel on it. When someone puts water on the fire the only way to make it grow is add fuel.

I doubled down. I doubled the donation to my friend.

I don’t think the donation will help my friend. Most people don’t understand how it works. They hold tight to the little bit they’ve got.

Choke out their own flames.

But my gift will increase MY fire. It always does.

I wish I could tell my friend how it works.

But I can’t.

He sees me as rich. He doesn’t understand what rich is. He won’t believe that rich is just a fire fueled with giving.

He thinks I give because of what I have.

He doesn’t know how selfish I am. I’m only generous because I want more.

Because this bonfire is just getting started.

It's The Thought That Counts.

It sucks.

You didn’t want it.

But there it is. A crummy gift.

“It’s the thought that counts” you say.

You don’t really mean it. You only say it to be nice.

But what if you’re right?

Maybe the only thing that really counts IS the thought. The thought of hope. Of anticipation. Of genuine gratitude.

Everyone thinks happiness is the stuff. “If I only had more money, a bigger house, a better partner; then I’d be happy.”

But no matter what you get you’ll always want more.

When I was a kid I wanted a trophy. I thought if I had a trophy I’d be happy. So I worked hard and competed and won my first one.

I was happy… but happiness only lasted for a week.

I remember looking at the trophy on my dresser and thinking: “Anyone can get ONE. But if I had TWO trophies that would be something special”.

I won the next.

Ten years later I had over a HUNDRED trophies. I had to store them in my basement.

The basement flooded. Back to no trophies.

I threw away all the ruined pieces of junk. I didn’t care. The only thing that mattered was the memories I had collected along the way.

Collect memories not stuff. Memories are a lot easier to take with you when you move!

---

How would you feel if you got a letter in the mail telling you you have just won 1,000,000 dollars?

Excited, happy, joyful?

But if tomorrow you woke up and discovered the letter was a fake what would happen then?

But the thing is THERE NEVER WAS A MILLION DOLLARS IN THE FIRST PLACE!

You changed your entire behavior based on only a thought.

Because you believed a lie you experienced joy.

So joy doesn’t come from real things. Joy only comes from what you BELIEVE!

And a belief is just a thought.

If you can change the thought you can change your happiness.

---

Here are some tips on creating thoughts that really count.

• Remember that STORIES are always better than things.

One day I went to a competition in rural Louisiana. I had ridden 18 hours in the back of a cramped van to compete.

It was a hot day in a gym with NO air conditioning. Very few competitors showed. Only two other guys were in my division.

It was a single elimination tournament, so I knew that the worst I can do is take third place.

I drew the bye. This means that the first two guys have to fight and I get to fight whoever wins that match.

Now I know the worst I can do is 2nd place.

The two guys fight. One guy gets injured by an illegal technique and can’t continue. (They actually took him to the hospital).

The judge disqualifies and ejects the other guy who committed the foul.

After all the commotion I’m left standing alone by the edge of the ring for what feels like an hour.

Finally the head referee comes over; looks at me and says: “Congratulations! Looks like you’re the winner!”

They gave me a BIG (embarrassing) trophy!

I lost that trophy with all the others in the flood. But the flood never touched my story. I’ll have that for the rest of my life.

• Less is more

When you realize it’s not things that create happiness but instead thoughts it frees you. You can get rid of your stuff.

The less you have the less you have to clean, insure, guard, protect.

I used to have a friend was a serious Harley rider. He constantly worked on and rebuilt his bike. It was an amazing work of art.

But he never took it anywhere without parking near a window. He was always on guard against thieves or vandals.

My friend even refused to park it outside. He even built a ramp so he could pull it up and keep it inside his apartment at night!

I learned from my friend.

Today I ride a scooter. It’s cheap, easy to ride, easy to replace.

Get rid of all the (figurative) Harley’s in your life.

Hop on a scooter.

You won’t look cool. But maybe dumping what other people think of you is just one more thing to get rid of.

• When you are afraid take action.

My stepson was 5 years old. On Halloween everyone else wanted to go through the Boy Scout haunted house.

But Forrest was too afraid. The people that jumped out scared him.

But Mom gave him a secret.

She told him: “Forrest honey; the secret is that monsters can’t scare you if you scare them first”.

Forrest led the group that day.

At every corner this brave five year old would leap out curl up his fingers into claws and snarl as loud as he could - argghhhhhhhhhhhhh!”

A few of the monsters backed off. A few of them laughed.

But nobody bothered him.

You’ve got to learn to put your monsters on defense. When you feel fear all it is is the Universe telling you: “Do something!”

• Improve every day

I’ve created a little app on my phone. It’s free, easy, and I’ll show you how if you email me. (don’t worry it will only take a Google account and about 15 minutes). My app gives me a list of questions I ask myself every day. The questions are a simple yes or no.

I ask myself questions like: “Did I improve my health today by 1%?”

Or: “Did I improve my relationships today by 1%?”

Answering my list of questions takes about 20 seconds. But the effect this daily asking has had on me is AMAZING!

I can’t tell you how many runs I’ve taken because I knew I’d have to answer my questions. How many salads I’ve ordered. How many dishes have gotten put away and beds have been made.

I’m just telling you that if you start looking to get better by a tiny amount each day it will add up to something wonderful.

The truth is you can’t change your life much today. But you can improve your thinking by 1%.

But I was your stockbroker and I told you I could get you a 1% return every day this year wouldn’t you worship me? That would be a 365% return! Warren Buffett would bow!

Change your thoughts by 1% a day. You will see a massive return by the end of your first week.

By the end of a month the people around you will feel it.

By the end of the year you will - DENT THE UNIVERSE!

No kidding.

---

It’s true. The gift did suck. You didn’t need a yard gnome.

But when you  say: “It’s the thought that counts.” I hope you will remember it’s not just tongue and cheek.

You are right.

Thoughts are the ONLY thing that matter.

Don't Let Imaginary Weapons Kill You.

Imaginary weapons.

They will kill you quicker than real ones.

At self defense clinics it comes up. We show the move. Somebody raises their hand and says: “What would happen if the guy had a club or a rock?”

Our clinics are fun. We answer in a fun way: “This is just a hypothetical; right?

Questioner: “Right”

“So we’re just talking about a situation that's imaginary. Their weapon is just in the mind; right?”

“Right”.

We go on: “Here’s what you do. Since the weapon we are talking about is imaginary what you do is imagine a BAZOOKA. Then you can blow the bad guy away with it!”

Of course this is a joke (and we DO teach self defenses against weapons). But we are trying to make a point.

The mind is a rabbit hole.

It doesn’t matter what the situation. Your mind can always dream up something worse. And the more bad things you dream up the more excuses you’ll have to stop taking action NOW.

If the guy could have a knife why bother learning today's move?

Don't worry about “what if”. Instead focus on “What NEXT”.  Ask yourself “What can I do to move forward?”

What you learn today will put you in a position to move forward.

---

Are you sabotaging yourself with the imaginary weapon of “What if”?

“What if I ask her out and she laughs at me?” (If I don’t ask I won’t be embarrassed).

“What if working out hurts my sore knee?” (No sense starting if I’ll have to quit).

“What if no one likes me? (Better to hide who I really am).

Be present NOW. Let the “what if’s” take care of themselves. Usually they do.

When you take action you expand. When you become more you are more you can handle more. But it’s easy to hold yourself down.

All you need is two little words.

---

… So I wonder.

WHAT IF no one ever reads this?

WHAT IF people think it’s stupid?

But I remember why I write. I write for salvation.

Writing is when I get to confess.

I’m not cool. I’m not someone special. I don’t have some special knowledge that other people need. It’s easy to start believing those lies when you have followers.

I need to grow more.

And if I keep saying “what if” I won’t.

And when I don't grow I begin to die.

And then I will die never really being who I could have been.

---

Sticks and stones may break my bones.

But the words “what if” …

… WILL surely kill me.

The Illusion Of The "Cups And Balls"

He was breaking the magician's code! The secret of a thousand years.

He promised to reveal the secret to the illusion of the “Cups And Balls”.

The ancient illusion where small cotton balls seem to magically leap from cup to cup. At the end of the routine large objects like cue balls, potatoes and even birds magically appear under the cups.

The demonstration has bee performed up close and live for centuries.

And now Penn Jelette of “Penn and Teller” swore he was going to reveal the secret!

Penn said: “It’s actually very simple. The magician hides the large objects in his pockets and misdirects the audience. Then he simply puts them under the cups.

Absurd. How could it be that simple?

...

… "But wait; Penn says.

... “that’s NOT the secret.

...

The secret is something far more mystical...

Pnn Jelette went on: “The secret is the secret of all magic. Listen well because it's also the hidden secret of all success in life.”

I leaned in closely to the speaker on my phone as he spoke.

“The secret is based on doing what everyone thinks is impossible. Doing something people find unimaginable.

“Missing the prom and staying in front of the mirror in your room.

“Skipping meals. Staying up all night. Making incredible sacrifices.

“All because you are willing to stand in front of a mirror for 10,000 hours holding a few cups and balls. Moving them around over and over again until your fingers bleed. Looking at every angle, every facial expression, every gesture... again and again and again.”

“When a person is willing to work at inconceivable levels it creates an illusion. It look like magic.

He went on…

“All magic is is the conquest of effort over imagination. When you put out effort beyond what people can imagine people explain away what they see by calling it magic.”

“Now you have the secret of the ancient cups and balls.”

Slack jawed I thought…

… Do all magicians study martial arts?

Arrogance

Arrogance.

Easy to see in others. Harder to see in me.

I’m sitting in a bar in the Catalina Foothills looking at a beautiful mountain range. Sun is hitting it just right. It keeps changing colors. Green, to gold, to red.

Doesn’t get much better than this.

The thing about the mountains is they speak if you listen. They all say the same thing. They say: “We don’t care about your problems”.  They know they are too big for all that.

But what about the problem with my neighbor?

Mountain says: “We don’t care”.

What about my divorce?

Mountain says: “Don’t care”.

What about war, health care, elections?

“Nope”.

Mountains are just mountains. You can’t do anything about them. They just sit there stable. Ego-less.

I order another beer. (It’s called Roho, it’s local).

They have a TV on behind the bar. There’s playing some show where the people are visiting the Black Hills of South Dakota. Visiting Mount Rushmore.

So I’ve got the Catalina’s on my right just outside the glass wall. To my left there's a flat screen and they are showing Mt. Rushmore.

They are documenting how they carved it up. Put on it the faces of the old warriors, leaders, and politicians. Founders of our country they say.

These were great men. Men who made difficult choices. But still, they were ONLY men.

But I’m also wondering what I would think if I were sitting in a bar in China. If I looked up and saw a mountain range carved with the face of Chairman Mao. Or if I were in Russian and it was the face of Putin.

They say Mt. Rushmore is a “national treasure”.

But it was already a treasure before the artwork. Real treasures are gifts from God. Maybe it’s arrogant to think we can improve the work of Nature with a chisel.

I look back at the Catalina’s. They are changing back to gold again. I wonder what they think of this business of carving up mountains with faces.

Silently I ask.

They answer the way they always do: “We don’t give a shit about that either”.

Under Armour

When I’m out of shape I don’t feel like working out.

When I’m out of ideas I don’t feel like trying to think.

When my mind is wandering I don’t feel like meditating.

But those are the things I need to do the most.

Strength comes from the inside. Try it for yourself.

Go out and buy the highest quality, Under Amour underclothes. Put them on and go through your day. Your behavior will change! You will move with more energy. More confidence. Better eye contact.

All because of something no one else can see.

But that feeling you get from Under Armour doesn’t last. It wears off and you go back to who you were before.

Martial Arts is worn in a deeper place than even the finest clothing. It's permanent.

Martial Arts is “UNDER - Under Armour”. You can’t buy it. You can’t put it on and take it off. It can only be REVEALED from the inside.

You REVEAL your art by doing incredibly difficult things.

 Many people that practice martial arts in the west wear their accomplishments on the outside of the uniform with belts, patches and colors.

But real martial arts is worn in the heart.

Tim Ferris says it well: “A person’s success in life can usually be measured by the number of difficult conversations [decisions, actions] they are willing to have”.

True Martial Artists are those who are willing to have the difficult conversations. Willing to do the difficult things.

The members of a true Kamiza have taken the hard path. Made the difficult sacrifices. Held the difficult conversations.

The cloth sash can always be removed.

But real rank is eternal. It's not made with cotton or silk. 

Real rank is woven with the threads of the soul.

Screaming At Monsters

He was scared of the monsters.

He was only about 5. It was halloween. Everyone wanted to go in the boy scout haunted house.

He wanted to too but he was too scared. He cried and clung to Mom.

But then she told him a secret.

Sempai said: “Honey you don’t need to be scared. There is a secret to not being afraid. You are only scared because the monsters are scaring you. But if you decide it’s your job to scare THEM you can’t be afraid”.

Forrest’s jaw fell open. Could it be that simple?

They went through the haunted house together. At every corner Forrest would leap out in front of the group, his hands curved into scary claws and and snarl ARRHHHHHHHHHHH!

He never had so much fun in his life.

Fear is like that.

You can’t be afraid when your working on something. When your actively moving toward your goals. When you are taking ground.

Take back your ground. Stamp out fear. Here are a couple of ideas to help you.

• The company you keep.

Pay attention to who you surround yourself with. Some people delight in taking little problems and blowing them way out of proportion. They do it because they feel scared and worried and they want you to feel just like them.

But you can never be poor enough to make someone rich. You can never be angry enough to make someone happy. And you can never be afraid enough to make someone feel at peace.

Avoid these people. Excuse yourself and go to the bathroom. Move if you have to.

They simply are not worth it.

Instead surround yourself with people that encourage, uplift and downplay problems. Because those people are almost always right.

I don't know how it works but it’s true. Winners win.

Winners make things easier, lighter, more fun. Hang out with winners and you’ll win too.

• Think in terms of “directions” and not goals.

Most goal setting is BS. Traditional goal setting was created in the workforce by managers who wanted to squeeze every last drop of productivity out of their employees. But life is not like that.

A tree doesn’t decide how high it’s going to grow next year. A flower doesn’t decide when it’s going to bloom. Instead they do the best they can to do one thing right now. To grow!

How much does nature grow?

A little bit every day. A little bit every day in the direction of what IT wants.

To be free of fear focus on what you want and take a few tiny 1% steps toward it today. You will feel a ton better fast.

• Realize what fear is then TAKE ACTION.

If you walked into a room and smelled a chemical that was making you sick you’d leave the room. That’s because the sick feeling is telling you are exposed to something bad for you.

When you let yourself stay in fear it’s bad for you. When you are afraid you’re letting the bastards win.

Fear means you are listening to the wrong thoughts. You’re in the wrong room.

Step out of that room and focus on anything that makes you happy. Go for a walk. Write. Create. Make a few business calls. Don’t sit there like a pinata. Fear will keep taking blind swings at you.

It’s hard to take action when we don’t feel like it. It’s almost as if fear is saying: “Focus on this, pick at this with me”.

But you have to be strong enough to say: “No thank you”.

Because when you don’t feel like doing something that you usually need to do it  most.

Does the fat person feel like going for a walk? No - but if he doesn’t he’ll stay fat.

Does the poor person feel like saving? No - but if he doesn’t he’ll stay poor.

Does the shy guy really feel like asking her out? No - but if he doesn’t he’ll stay single.

When you are afraid do you really feel like finding ways to grow?...

                      ... No - but you do it anyway. Because if you don’t you’ll always be afraid!

Just like I was before I wrote you this.

Clean Up Your Life - Clean Up Your Mind

Listen to a talk on today's subject. 

It’s time to get organized. No more mess. No more frustration. No more going to the store to buy things you KNOW you already own because you can’t find them.

Your outside is a reflection of your inside. If you’re in a cluttered space it means you’ve got a cluttered mind. Get rid of the clutter and you will clean up your thinking!

I’m going to show you the most powerful way to clean up any cluttered space… FAST!

But first let’s look at what keeps people from getting organized. There are two reasons you don’t get your space organized.

• First you might be afraid if you put everything out of site you won’t be able to find things when you need them.

• Second, when you start the cleaning up process (because you don’t want to lose things) you often get bogged down in organizing. What started as a simple job turns into hours and hours that you don’t have.

The method I’m going to share eliminates both of those problems. You will never lose things again. And best of all you will be done in less than half an hour!

Too good to be true?

It’s not. Follow these directions and you will be amazed.

Here’s what you need.

1. A recording device. (an app on your phone is good).

2. Twenty identical boxes. I like to use the plastic kind with closable lids. I also like them to be pretty big so they will hold most objects. Take a sharpie and mark each of your boxes from 1 - 20 so that each box has an individual number on it.

3. You’ll need a Google or Microsoft storage account of some kind. It must be a place you can store documents that you can search later. It’s especially handy if you can search from your phone.

Here’s what you do.

Go into the space that is a mess and filled with tons of objects that need cleaning up. Let’s say it’s your garage.

Pull out your recorder. Open box one and start throwing stuff into it without regard to if it makes sense or not. Every time you drop something into box one speak into your recorder what you just did.

It might sound like this:
 

“Rusty screwdriver; box 1.”

“Tire Iron”; box 1”.

“Plastic halloween pumpkin; box 1”.

Keep going until you completely fill box one to the brim. Then repeat the process with box 2, 3, and so on until you get all boxes filled. This will take you only about 20 minutes in most cases.

Take a step back. Look at your garage. I bet it hasn’t looked that good in years!

20 matching boxes all in a row. No clutter anywhere.

But I know what some people might think. How will you find your stuff?

That’s the best part.

Sit down at your laptop. Open your online document and type a heading for “Box 1”. Play back your recording and type under your heading every item you hear. Do the same thing for all 20 boxes.

What have you just done?

You now have a SEARCHABLE document, stored in the cloud, accessible from your phone, where you will know exactly where every item in your garage is located. If you search in your document (for me I press CTR F) for “screwdriver” you will immediately see “rusty screwdriver” sitting neatly under the heading for box 1.

Hundreds of items. Packed away neatly in boxes. Every one you can access in moments by checking your phone. It doesn’t get any easier than that.

You can add items any time. You can remove items any time. Just make sure you always remember to record where on your document. After about six months pull up your sheet and look it over. You will notice a lot of junk you threw in those boxes you’ll probably never need.

Print your sheet off and simply cross off anything you think it’s OK to throw out. Do you really need that rusty screwdriver anymore?

Take your sheet out to the garage and dump all the junk. You haven’t seen it for six months anyway. Let it go.

Update your sheet.

I used this system (when I had a big house) for well over a decade and I can’t tell you how great it worked. Especially for those rarely used hard to find tools and objects.

Update your sheet. Organize your life. Clean up your thinking.

I gotta run. Got to get ready to head up to Sifu Brown's for the Kamiza. Need my original Black Obie.

Where is it? (Clicking on my phone).

Got it. Box 9!

Bite Your Tongue!

Listen to a short talk on this post!

“I'm a positive thinker but it hasn't done much for me. Why not?”

I asked. My teacher answered:

“You are lying to yourself. You are not as positive as you say you are”.

Ouch.

---

Sempai Shelly got those invisible braces. She has to take them out every time she eats.

Do you know what happened to her calorie intake?

She said: “I never realized before how much I was eating. It was only a little snack here and a little snack there. At the end of the day I would have sworn I hadn’t eaten very much. But now I realize I was eating a lot more than I thought”.

And that’s what we all do with our thinking and speaking. Lots of things come out of our mind without our being aware. The problem with our thinking and speaking is so much of it is habitual. We are like robots; following old patterns and programs.

You need a technique that makes your thinking visible. You need a technique that gives you feedback to how you are doing from moment to moment.

Today I’m giving you one.

---

Bite your tongue.

Not figuratively - literally.

Every time you feel a negative emotion (Fear, Anger, Jealousy) it only means one thing. You ARE thinking negatively.

Every time you feel a negative emotion bite down. Maybe make it hurt a little.

I thought I was a positive thinker until I created this technique. At the end of the first day my tongue felt like raw hamburger!  I had absolutely no idea how negative I was until I started doing this.

 By the end of the first week my tongue was less sore. I wasn't biting it nearly as much.

By the next week my life started to improve.

This  technique will change your life. It gives you real world physical feedback on how you are thinking and speaking. With a week of practice your ability to keep yourself in a positive state will dramatically improve.

Your life will reflect your state.

Try it and you will see.

One Shot

I was so afraid.

She told me about the special coat.

She was a little girl when we saw it.

It was the first time she had ever been in Savers. She told me how much she loved Savers as a child. She said “Savers is the best place because EVERY item is one of a kind”.

The coat was one of a kind too.

It was red, big wide collars, with big buttons. It looked just like the coat her hero Mary Tyler Moore wore.

My little girl wanted it so badly. She told me how she had begged and pleaded with me to buy it for her.

My daughter, now a grown woman with a child of her own spoke. I listened as I continued to drive into the night.

We are all so busy. These moments where we are together are so rare.

She told me about how beautiful the coat was. How she had begged and pleaded with me. How she had never wanted anything so badly in her life.

It washed over me. The sadness that comes when you lose something you will never get back.

I would never have a chance to buy my little girl a coat like that again!

Then I felt the terrible FEAR.

Did I miss my chance?

Some things in life give you only one shot.

… Did I refuse?

I couldn’t remember. Money was so tight back then.

Was I so foolish and greedy that I failed to buy it for my little girl. The one special coat? A coat that I could never give her again?

Sometimes you get only one chance.

“God please; please; make it so it didn’t happen. Please let me know I did the right thing!”. I prayed as I listened.

My voice cracked.

… “Did... I... get it... for you??”

She glowed.

“I wore it every day to school forever. I loved it. Yes - thank you!

“I love you Dad."

I drove on.

Finally my hands stopped shaking.

You're Life Mission: Killing Zombies!

The old lady had fallen and was still being pelted with snowballs.

Dozens of were there; but they didn’t really SEE it.

I went over to help. She was crying and yelling things. I felt awful. I should have stood up for her, said something, stepped in. All my heroes in the comics would have.

But I was scared. I guess everyone else was too.

A few days later someone came to my school. He punched me in the face while I was sitting in history class. They told me he did it because I tried to help.

The teacher didn’t say anything (I think she was scared too). She let me go to the bathroom to clean up the blood.

Word was they weren’t finished. I was afraid for weeks.

Sometimes I look away from people who need help.

Bullies taught me to be afraid of helping others.

---

As a kid I didn’t always get enough to eat.

They passed down the old affirmations: “There’s not enough to go around. Get your share before it runs out. The rich are holding us down”.

When I’m at a restaurant and the bill comes I won't look at it. I ask Sempai Shelly to put it on her card and sign it. I know it's not fair to her but I do it sometimes anyway. That way I don’t have to face the part of me that’s still afraid.

Today I might have lots of money in my pocket but sometimes I’m the poorest in the room.

My ancestors taught me to be afraid of lack.

---

At a weird underground church they showed scary movies. Horrible and unspeakable things that would happen to people in the end times.

They taught me to be afraid of sex, rock music, and the devil.

Behind it all was the greatest fear of all. The fear that you might not be good enough. The fear that Jesus might leave you behind.

Today every now and then when I find myself alone I feel a twinge of anxiety. Did it happen? Did He leave me? As a kid I asked Jesus to save me every night.

Sometimes I still do.

The fanatics taught me to be afraid of being alone.

---

It’s hard.

Hard to be generous when you haven’t had much. Hard to be kind when you've faced cruelty. Hard to forgive when others haven’t forgiven you.

But you know what else is hard? Not being able to sleep at night. Not looking the homeless guy in the eye. Not being able to know God loves you.

I might suck at it but I’m in the game. I think that’s all that life asks.

Every time I blame the past I cop out. Copping out lets me hold on to my fear.

Better to recognize fear for what it is.

Mindless hunger.

A zombie.

Fear is your past reaching it’s hand from the grave.

It’s gnarly hand holds tight to your ankle. It want’s to pull you down where the other dead things are.

Stay strong. Pull away. Stay above ground.

Surviving your zombies is your job. Surviving your zombies is your purpose.

Because if you're not careful you’ll let your fear bite you. If you get bitten you’ll become mindless too.

Mindless, starving, and trying to live off of the flesh of others.

Like all those others that taught me to be afraid.

How To Be Your Own Genie (Part Two)

If you would prefer to listen to a live talk that gives some of the highlights in the article you can listen here instead.

They dreamed of buying a little motel in the south. It would make enough money so they wouldn’t have to live only on social security. They’d spend their days working on the place and preparing it for happy guests who would come to visit. Family could come too.

It never happened.

Something always got in the way. The basement flooded. Mom needed help. Papaw got sick.

When I was little I’d ask Grandma about the motel, but she would get upset. Sometimes she would cry. I stopped asking.

My Grandparents died poor.

Lessons From A Millionaire

I know of a wealthy person who runs multiple businesses, sits on the board of numerous charities, golfs and and travels frequently.  Yet he always seems to have time for the things that matter.

One day someone asked him how he gets so much done.

He explained that most people spend all day working but only spend a tiny amount of time thinking. He explained that the key to success is THINKING. He said: “To succeed you’ve got to spend MORE time thinking than you do working”!

I didn’t know how to think most of my life. I struggled just like my Grandparents.

I didn't know the formula. Know the formula and you can become a powerful thinker. 

I’m going to teach you how.

What is thinking?

 

You have flashes of thought about the world around you. You smell food and you think of eating. You hear music and you think of a vacation. These images flash into your mind all the time. But those images in your head are NOT thinking. I don’t know what you might call them. Maybe “mind pictures”, or “mind words” or whatever. But that mind stuff is not the same thing as actual “thinking”.

Real thinking is more like what happens during a game of chess. In chess on each turn you are given an opportunity to consider your choices. You look at all the possibilities and choose the best one. Discovering many possibilities and choosing the best is real thinking.

Sadly our entire education is dead set against thinking. Our system is designed to make you follow rules. Stay in the lines. Fill in the blanks.

But the key to success is not inside the lines. Success is outside. Thinking is creating.

Playing chess is also a good example of how to get results in life.

When you start to lose at chess what happens? YOU HAVE NO MORE MOVES. You’ve LOST your possibilities. When you lose your possibilities you die.

So thinking is discovering possibilities. Death is having NO possibilities.

Imagine chess (life) being played by someone who doesn’t know how to think.

Without thinking you're stuck with only one or two moves. With only a few choices almost anything you do is a mistake. People make terrible mistakes when they don’t know they have other options.

Limited choices limit your success. Limited choices set you up to fail.

Thinking is the key. You can’t work hard enough to make up for poor thinking. Working harder without quality thinking is like trying to win a game of chess by moving your pieces faster or slamming them around with force. Working harder is probably the worst thing you could do, because every time you try harder you have less energy for real thinking.

Every action you take without focused thinking digs you deeper and deeper into a hole.

How Does A Master Play?
 

Now imagine the opposite chess (life) game. This time it’s being played by a Grand Master. What does he do? He WAIT’S. He FOCUSES. He looks around the board for all the possibilities. The more he can come up with the greater his chances of winning.

That’s the difference between the novice and the Master. The Master can see many possibilities. The novice sees only a few.

The Master knows how to think. The novice does not.

How To Think
 

This method is stolen; I totally ripped it off from James Altucher. (It’s OK; he probably stole it from somewhere too). This method might be the most important lesson you ever learn. For more details you should buy Claudia and James Book “The Idea Machine”. (It’s only costs 99 cents but it's worth millions.)

Here’s my take.

Pick something you want to improve. (You can use just about anything; but I like to start with something I’m working on at the time).

Your area of desired improvement could be how to reduce your heating bill. It could be how to lose ten pounds. It could be how to save more money. It doesn’t matter.

… Drum roll please!

Then you take a pad of paper and write down 10 ideas how to solve your problem.

Viola… that’s it!

I know what you are thinking. There has to be more.

You think there needs to be more because you have believe that coming up with ideas is easy. NOTHING FURTHER COULD BE FROM THE TRUTH. Writing down ten ideas sounds easy, but it only your first few ideas are easy. Writing down all ten ideas daily might be some of the hardest work you ever do.

Idea creation is like doing a plank position in Pilates. Easy at first... but after 30 seconds… it starts to get tough! When searching for ideas starts to get tough you are stretch your brain power. You are developing your creativity. Writing ten ideas forces you to get your mind in shape.

Why it works.

 

Very few people ever take the time to get beyond the first 2 or 3 ideas before they stop. Most people live their entire lives and rarely get past idea 2 or 3 ideas on any subject.

It’s the later ideas; the ones you have to work for, that requires real thinking. It’s in those later ideas (usually anywhere between 6 - 10) that you unleash your inner genie.

Altucher puts it this way:

“Everybody says ideas are a dime a dozen; I say ideas are a dime for about THREE.

After that ideas start to get EXPENSIVE”.

--

The Process

The first two or three ideas you come up with are easy; they usually don’t have much value. 

After your first 3 ideas you’ve got a problem. You're staring at a blank sheet of paper that needs 7 more ideas. Your mind starts to wander.

You keep concentrating. Every time your mind drifts away you bring it back to that damn blank sheet of paper.  A few minutes goes by and POP; out come another idea!

6 more to go. You start to sweat.

You think of reasons to quit. You begin to make excuses. You think: “I'm too busy for this right now. I can come back and do it later. This is stupid”.

But if you stay focused over the next 20 to 30 minutes you will gradually come up with idea after idea.

Usually between idea five and ten smagic happens. Between ideas 5 and 10 you enter into a different level of thinking! You enter the place where the super successful spend most of their time. The place where all of your power lies.

Between your stupid, impractical and boring ideas you will find ideas that are …POWERFUL! These are the thoughts that will change your life.

You will always know when you’ve come up with a good idea. Good ideas cause you to be instantly motivated! They make you think:” WOW - Why didn’t I think of that before! I’ve got to try it”!

You will be shocked at how many great ideas you come up with. With practice every area of your life will improve; from health, to finances, to even your relationships. All because of this simple exercise.

Your genie will be loose. You will be a creator.

--- 

“The opposite of war is not peace; It’s creation”. - Jonathan Larson

Two Important Notes:

1. Break Big Ideas Down

Sometimes you come with an idea that’s good but it’s too big. Writing my first book: “Break The Chain!” was like that. I knew I HAD to write it; but I had no idea how.

If your idea seems too big to implement it only means you haven’t broken it down enough. After I decided to write a book the new question I used to generate ideas became: “How do I PUBLISH a book”?

For a big project you might have to repeat the process several times and drill deeper and deeper. Eventually you will hit a good idea that you can take action toward NOW. When you come up with an idea that motivates you AND you know what to do you’ve hit gold.

When I asked myself how to write a book a few good ideas came up. One idea was to take an online publishing course (I started one the same day). Another was to develop the daily habit of writing a blog (I started THIS blog that day too). Now I'm over a hundred pages in.

There were dozens of other ideas that needed to be created in order for me to finish the project. Questions like: “How do I organize it?” “What are the best tools to store it?” “What are the best subjects to write about?”

Taking each of these questions one at a time and using them as part of my daily idea creation practice is how I got through it. Now not only do I have a book published. I KNOW how to do it again; and I will be easier. My second book will be released in early 2016.

Asking questions and creating ideas made my books possible.

Write ten ideas. One or two of them will demand your attention because they’re good. Work on those and you will move forward. If one of the ideas motivates you but you don’t know how to do it use the place you are stuck as a starting point for a new set of ten ideas. Eventually you will come up with an idea that gets you moving.

Keep asking questions and creating ideas until you become healthy, wealthy and wise. Then keep doing it for the rest of your life.

You will start making progress toward your goals within ONE week. Try it and you’ll see.

2.  Practice EVERY Day

Lastly (and important) you must do this exercise DAILY. Some days you won’t have anything you are working on. Those are great days to come up with ideas for others. I’ve vastly improved taxi services, book stores, law practices and even coffee cups; all in my head. I write my ten ideas because it sharpens up my mind.

Every time you write ten ideas you are training your genie to respond to your voice. If you contact her daily she will come to you quicker. It doesn’t matter if the ideas help you directly. Just write ten ideas every day no matter what.

Creating ideas is thinking. Do it often. You never know when you’ll need it.

---

Sometimes when I drive at night I see those little motels and think of my Grandparents.

I wonder if they live in a little motel in heaven. A place where all the Grand Kids and Great Grand Kids can some day visit.

Maybe one day I’ll get to see them again. I’ll pretend to be a guest checking in. They'll be surprised and there will be hugs and lots of laughs.

I'll sit down with them and my pad of paper.

I bet I can come up with some ideas to make the place even better!

How To Be You're Own Genie (Part 1)

The man on TV was crying. They broke his tricycle. He couldn’t get another.

This was the first TV I can ever remember watching. It was an old episode of Star Trek and I was about five.

I remember how sad it made me. I kept thinking “If I had a tricycle I’d give it to him”.

That was the first time I can ever remember the feeling of lack. At five I figured out two things that are part of my philosophy today.

• First; not being able to replace something you lose is what causes lack.

• Second; lack causes fear. (If you have a whole warehouse filled with tricycles if one breaks it’s no big deal. But if you’ve only got one and can’t get another you will cry when it breaks. You will also do ANYTHING to protect it).

I know a lady who is shady in her business dealings. She is constantly misstating truths, doing back room deals, negotiating and manipulating.

She hates her job. She lies so that they don’t fire her. She is afraid she will lose the income so she stays. She gives up her integrity because of her fear.

I know. I’ve been there.

People will sometimes do the most horrible things when they are afraid. If there was a silver bullet to solve most of the world's problems it would be this: stomp out fear. Because fear is always the result of lack.

No one wants to be cruel. No one wants to lie and cheat. It takes too much energy.

But people will continue to be evil as long as they are afraid. No amount of preaching about having values and better ethics is going to stop them. It’s impossible to discipline yourself to the point where you’re character is stronger than your fear.

The key is to destroy the fear.

I used to watch “I Dream Of Jeannie”. Like 75 million other American boys I watched because had a crush on Barbara Eden. But I also liked the premise of the show. What if you had a Genie? What if no matter what you needed could be produced. Presto!

How would you treat others? How would you live your life? Knowing how to create your own good will make you a kinder and more loving human being. When you know how to bring your own good to you you will become more of the person you really want to be.

I want to show you how to unlock your inner Genie. She won’t look as hot as Barbara Eden was; but she will still fulfill your dreams. When you let her out of the bottle you get rid of fear.

To understand what I'm saying you need to know where stuff comes from. Most people have the wrong model of where things come from. With the wrong model you can’t even begin to make life better.

The WRONG model is the belief that there is a limited supply of things. People think that there are piles of stuff sitting around and the world is “first come first serve”. You’ve got to get your share before anyone else. Whoever gets to the stuff first is called “lucky”. So everyone is in a race to get to the stuff.  (That’s why they call life a “rat race”.)

A good analogy for this screwed up model comes from Richard Bach’s classic: “Jonathan Livingston Seagull”. In the book there’s a trash heap. The gulls scrounge daily at the heap, pecking and clawing at each other for a scrap here and there.

But where did the trash heap come from in the first place? It’s byproduct of things that OTHER people created. The trash heap is what’s left after a feast. It’s the bones, the banana peels, the crust of someone else’s abundance.. Sure; there might be a piece of something good here or there but mostly it’s just garbage.

If you want to be free of fear you can’t be like the seagulls and spend your time sifting through the trash. You must become a creator. You’ve got to learn how to create your own abundance instead of hoping you’ll be lucky enough to find it in the leftovers. To do that you have to have a different model of the world. Here’s a better one:

Abundance comes from what I create.

Here’s another principle. You might want to write this one down.

In order for me to create, I must become CREATIVE.

Creativity is intelligence. Creativity allowed our species to rise to the top of the food chain. Creativity will release you from the rat race and make you free of fear.

Creativity is not something you are born with. It must be developed.

But it's easier than you think. I'm going to teach you a method so powerful that your whole life can change in as little as 30 days.

Stay tuned. In my next post I’m going to show you how.

Why Yoda Likes Yoga Pants

My body hurts. I’m too busy. I’m slow and probably look stupid. But I'm running anyway.

Sometimes it’s hard to get out. If I think too much I’ll never do it.

Better just to run.

Because when I finish I always feel better.

I might not look cool doing it. I make myself do it anyway.

---

I was out running the other day. About half a mile into my three miles I could hear distant voices following behind. I could hear two women softly chatting as they followed the same path.

I wondered about them. Do I know them? (They must be from the neighborhood). How long will they go? (I’m going three miles - will they keep up)?

Mostly I wondered if they were attractive.

Over the next two miles those voices kept getting closer. They were gaining. (This isn’t a short jog; they’ve been out for a while now. Maybe college students that run track? They must be hard core).

I hope they’re pretty!

They’re gaining. I hope I don’t look stupid. Obviously they are better runners than me because they are moving faster.

Finally the women caught up. They were both about my age and yes they were both VERY attractive. (You might even say gorgeous.)

They slowly began to pass.

But more.

They weren’t actually running.

They were... (Long Pause.)

... WALKING.

I was running.

They were walking.

They were passing me.

---

Professor Dunn told me one of the reasons he liked to practice kata.

He told me he had always been the big one, the strong one. The fighter.

But practicing kata forced him to do moves easier for smaller people. Leaping and landing on one foot, pivots, balancing. Skills that require grace.

Professor went said: “I like to have things in my life I’m not the good at. I like to have things that I can rub my ego against. Trying is more important than being best”.

Thanks Professor.

---

What will people think of me? I need to get in shape first. I don’t want to look stupid.

All of that is ego. Ego says: “Stay here with me where it’s warm and safe”.

Yoda said: “There is no try; there is only do”.

Yoda wanted Luke to use the Force.

But the Force isn’t just floating around the Universe. The force is inside you.

You use the force when you act in spite of your fear!

The other day my waitress used the Force.

She was young; shy. It was her first job.

She didn’t WANT to come up and talk to strangers. She didn’t FEEL like smiling and making small talk.

She FORCED herself.

It was obvious she was using the Force. You could see it in her hands. It’s power coursing through her veins made them shake.

Something about being in the presence of someone facing fear is humbling. If you were to interview the people at the table they would all say: “I don’t know what it was; but I really liked the waitress”.

Everyone she waited on felt touched. Most wouldn’t realize on a conscious level it was because of the energy she was transmitting.

Her presence gave us more nourishment than the food she served.

Her tips were huge.

...

Use the Force. Join the play. Sing in the choir. Sign up for martial arts.

You don’t have to be good. You don’t have to lead. All the Universe is asking is that you participate.

Someone said:

 “If you’re not the lead dog in the pack the view is always the same”.

But you DON’T always have to lead.

Whoever said that forgot to mention one thing. Sometimes the view from the back is just fine.

Especially if the people who pass you are wearing yoga pants.

Why You Should NEVER Jump Off Buildings.

My team is getting destroyed.

I’ve lost nearly every game. The last two by more than 70 points.

It started off great. It was gonna be a great year. I even got Aaron Rodgers!

Now it’s a bust.

But maybe the season isn’t a total loss. Fantasy Football has taught me lessons about life. Here are a few of them.

No guarantee you’ll win.

You’ve got a great idea. You want to try it. But just because the idea is good and just because you are willing to go for it doesn’t guarantee your success.

Your idea is saying: “Come dance with me!”

You dance with your idea for a while; and sometimes she slaps you right in the face.

Next morning you get up face still stinging. There she is again waiting for the school bus. She says to you: “Come carry my books”.

Should you? Are you willing to get slapped again?

It all depends. Is she worth it?

Everything you want in life comes with a slap. If you willing to take the slap who knows; you might end up with love.

But for god’s sake don’t carry the books if you’re not willing to take the slap!

Your ideas. Your dreams. They are calling you. Asking you...

… am I worth the slap?

Relationships allow you to trade.

Most teams in Fantasy need help. It’s important to be friends with who you're playing with. If you have an honest reputation you can get trades.

Trades have to be win/win or else no one will trade with you.

In life people will trade with you if you are honest in your dealings. They will trade with you if they know you and trust you. They will trade with you if you are their friend.

Your success depends on making and keeping friends.

Knowledge is power.

It helps to know what you're doing. You’ve got to know what’s happening in the league from week to week. You’ve got to know who’s hot and who’s not. Reading helps.

In life if you want to succeed you’ve got to read. You’ve got to take time each day and develop your mind.

I ask kids what the most powerful card is. Sometimes they say it’s the Ace of Spades. Other times they mention a credit card or even a baseball card.

I give them the real answer: It’s their LIBRARY card!

Jim Rohn says it well: “Spend more than 200,000.00 on a house and it will always have a library”. This is NO coincidence.

Don’t raise the stakes too high.

In Fantasy if you put all your eggs in one basket you get in trouble. What if the player you invested everything in gets hurt?

Life is like that too. I’ve heard people say “Jump and the Universe will catch you”.

I say: “The Universe never promised to catch you”.

It’s your decision to jump. You jump out of love. Love is never guaranteed.

You might end up broke.

Shattered and busted.

If you do the Universe will say to your groaning and crumpled body: “Wanna carry my books?”

Will you?

It depends on how busted up you are. If you’re too broke and shattered you’ll probably quit.

Better to hedge your bet. That way if you lose you won’t fall too far.

People say to me: “Is it true; if I really want it bad enough can I have I have anything?”

I say: “You can have most of what you want in life but you have to work up to it. One thing at a time.”

They say: “What if I want to fly? Should I jump off a tall building”?

I say: “Instead, why don’t you practice in the middle of an open field”?

Be an adult. Don’t depend on the Easter Bunny. Don’t put all your money on black.

1% improvement a day. Every day. Eventually risk disappears.

Change leagues if you need to.

This week I started in another league. It’s brand new.

Why?

Because I’m getting killed in my first league.

You don’t have to keep doing something you are getting killed at. Move up. Move on. You don’t have to stay in misery. Sometimes the most powerful words are: “I quit”.

Don’t wait until it’s too late. Don’t wait until the whole season's over.

You work hard all day to pay the bills and he sits on the couch and watches TV? Maybe it’s time to move on?

Stop making excuses for the things and people that are stealing your life from you. There are other leagues. Believe me.

Don’t wait to get paid. Don’t wait and accept being abused.Don’t wait and miss love.

If you can see an out take it. Life can get better.

Fun

Fantasy Football is supposed to be fun.

Life is supposed to be fun too. If it isn’t maybe you can fix it?

Keep changing things around.

Throw stuff out. Rearrange the furniture. Change the channel.

The bumper sticker says: “Pain is temporary; glory is forever”.

I’m going to make up a new sticker and slap it over the old one.

It says: “Glory is forever; but FUN is right now”!

Have your cake and eat it NOW. Have fun today and maybe you’ll win. Maybe you’ll lose. But either way the purpose of the game is fun.

---

Another bad weekend.

Between Aaron Rogers, Emmanuel Sanders, Chris Johnson, my kicker and my defense I just scored ONLY 19 points! My god; I’m the Cleveland Browns of fantasy football!

If any of the guys in my league happen to read this post; does anyone want to trade me a great running back and receiver for Aaron Rodgers?

… I’m just sayin.

Thanksgiving

The woman at the farm house told us the station in front of Walmart was 14 miles away. We only had gas for 8.

We were in West Virginia, driving to North Carolina. I had been looking for an open station for well over an hour.

It was pitch black. There was no cell service.

I stayed under 20 miles per hour to save gas. I turned my blinkers on and rolled through every red light without stopping. I held my breath up every hill. I exhaled every time we coasted down.

The “miles to go” on the dash read “0” with 3 miles still to go.

Somehow we made it. I coasted up to the pump and stopped - barely touching the brakes.

The pump said “closed. ... Just like all the others.

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Walmart was open. We went in to call AAA.

It got me thinking.

Your evolution in life can be measured based on your feelings toward Walmart.

1. INNOCENCE: You LOVE Walmart. They have cool stuff. You wish you could get some.

2. SURVIVAL: You NEED Walmart. The baby needs diapers. You need to get groceries. You hope you can pay your credit card bills.

3. EGO RULED: You RESENT Walmart. You don’t like big box stores. You think you’re better than Walmart. You're better than the people that shop there.

4. GRATITUDE: You LOVE Walmart. You’re thankful. They have everything you need. The more thankful you are the more you are blessed.

I didn’t always love Walmart. I’m glad I do now.

I like to tell Sempai Shelly: “Since I can afford any single item in Walmart it’s like I own the store!”.  

I pretend they are keeping all the stuff nice and neat just for me. They even give me multiple locations so no matter where I travel my stuff is near. All I have to do is bring in a credit card and I can take any of my stuff home. If it's too big to carry they'll even help me pack it.

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My Thanksgiving adventure reminded me to be thankful for:

People.

Tow truck drivers who give you impossibly long driving directions because they care. Ours worked for Triple AAA. The nearest station was 29 miles away. We followed him there.

Service people who work holidays and provide food and other items to tired travelers like me. I always talk with them. At every stop there’s a chance to make a new friend. It’s funny who I’ve become. I used to be shy and introverted with no friends. Now I make them at Love’s on 75 south.

Bad coffee. I’m thankful for burnt coffee. It tastes best with one of those lids you need to use your tongue on to find the opening. Sometimes it burns you. But somehow in the dark when everyone else is sleeping it tastes great. I’m also thankful for the guy who thought to put the little light in the cup holder so I can put my coffee back down.

I’m grateful for travel plazas with gift shops and a “Subway”. I’m thankful for dark haired women who wear boots and smile at you as you get the door for them.

I’m grateful for clean free bathrooms.

Giggles

I’m thankful for Sempai Shelly and her sense of humor. Running out of gas and trying to get to safety in the middle of the night somehow ends up feeling like a sleigh ride. Her giggle is like a force field that protects from even the scariest situations.

If the the warrior Musashi threatened her with his sword she’d find something to giggle about. She’d tease him about his outfit. He’d probably laugh too. Then they’d both laugh. Then they’d end up drinking Saki.

“ ... hey Musashi - watch yourself - that’s MY girlfriend”!!!

Then she’d giggle at my jealousy. Then I’d see it and laugh too. Then we’d ALL end up drinking saki TOGETHER!

That’s the power of that giggle. She giggles and you get to hang out with 16th century warriors.

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Random Gratitude

I’m thankful for being a guy. I’m thankful for all the guy things I’ll enjoy tomorrow. (Mainly beer and football).

And more beer.

I’m thankful that the guy I’m playing fantasy football with put in Romo at the last minute. Romo gave him a  -1. Yes!!!!!!

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I’m thankful for all the really incredible people in my life. There really are too many friends and teachers to mention. If you are reading this and even REMOTELY think I might be talking about you; I am.

I’m also thankful for Mr. Joe, Mr. Steven and Mr. Mike. They actually seem to run things BETTER than they would be when I’m at the dojo. I miss them and love them all.

I’m thankful for the Source of abundance. Wealth does NOT come from how much you have or what others give you.

Wealth comes from gratitude.

It's nice to find a little when you're out of gas in the middle of the night.

How To Stop Spinning Your Wheels

Stop spinning your wheels. Find some traction. Get where you want to go safely.

Be sure you’re measuring your progress correctly. Progress comes the way it wants too. Progress isn’t linear. Progress grows like a vine; every which way.

Progress isn’t like laying a brick wall. Progress is more like putting together a jigsaw puzzle. You never know which piece is going to fit in next.

When you measure  your progress only one way you limit yourself. You can’t measure intelligence by looking at grades. You can’t measure martial art skill by looking at belts. You can’t measure productivity by looking at a to do list.

People think they are making progress if they get lots of things checked off their list. They’re wrong.

Getting things done doesn’t move you forward unless you do the RIGHT things. The only true measurement is did you find a way to improve a tiny bit today over yesterday.

I created a tool to help.

It’s a simple 4 question quiz I fill out every day. I focus on THEMES instead of items to do.

• Did you improve your fitness and health by 1%?
• Did you improve your mind by 1%?
• Did you improve your relationships by 1%
• Did you improve your attitude by 1%?

I’ve noticed it’s INCREDIBLY hard to get four “Yes” check marks. A good day is getting in two. A great day is three. And a FANTASTIC day is when I can check off all four.

Less than two and my day sucked.

Having the list has made a huge difference. Before I had this little quiz life wasn't as good. I used to wake up and start to work on my to do list. My list had dozens of tasks I tried to get done.

Sometimes I’d get a lot of my to do’s finished. But at the end of the day I was making little progress in the areas that mattered. I’d finish my day and skip working out. Skip reading or doing my self development stuff. I’d skip making progress toward my goals.

Without my list of four themes I was spinning my wheels.

That’s what the list of themes does for you. It gives you traction.

By using a list of four themes your day will automatically organize itself. Lots of the items on your todo lists get done enroute to working on your themes.

You decide to go for a run and realize you’ve got library books to return and a grocery list. You decide to run at the park near the library and grocery store.

While you’re at the grocery store you see the perfect bouquet of flowers and pick them up for your wife.

While you are working on your mind you get an idea that improves your workflow. You change the position of your laptop. Suddenly you’re productivity goes up.

Since I started using themes I’m actually getting MORE done from my to do list than before.

Nothing exists in a vacuum. When you make progress in one area you will begin to make progress in ALL areas. If you decide to lift weights and you get stronger it doesn’t just help you in the gym. It helps you unload the stuff in your trunk too.

Every area you make progress helps every other area.

But that’s the key. You’ve got to make progress.

Following a few themes instead of a long todo list is one of the best ways to do that.

Follow themes; get some traction.

The Devil Hates Naked Ladies

Sifu Brown teaches meditation. One day one of his students asked him: “Why don’t we have ranks in meditation?  Why don’t we make it a contest to see who can meditate longest?”

Sifu hit him with a stick!

Actually Sifu didn’t hit him (I just thought it would have been cool). But I’m sure Sifu THOUGHT about hitting him.

But that’s what we do. We take a practice designed to lead to enlightenment and turn it into a competition.

It would be like turning prayer into competition. “Look at me; I prayed more times than you this week. God probably loves me more!”

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I’ve heard people say: “Prayer is talking to God. Meditation is listening.”

But they never tell you who you’re listening to.

Meditate for only a few minutes and the devil speaks to you.

He’s pretty easy to hear if you know what to listen for.

Any time you try  something new he speaks. Learn to paint. Write a poem. Give money to the poor.

Meditate.

You’ll hear him!

In martial arts we call his voice the ego.

The ego tells you aren’t good enough. It discourages you when you create. The ego embarrasses you, shames you, tells you you’re wasting your time. Wasting your money.

The ego wants you to quit.

Mostly the ego wants you to go back to being just like everyone else. Sit down. Don’t stand out. Stay in line.

The ego is a liar. The ego tries to convince you you are less than enough. You’ve got to prove you are worthy. You’ve got to beat someone else to be loved. That’s why the ego LOVES competition.

It takes your mind off of who you really are.

The ego knows you are already a Master. You are already God's gift to the world. You are a gift that no one has ever seen before or will ever see again.

Competition blinds you to your greatness. Competition makes you think there is someone between you and your goals. It convinces you you’ve got hunt down the witch and bring back the broom. Then you get to the good stuff.

There is no witch. There is no broom. You’ve already got the good stuff.

Just don’t look behind the curtain.

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When I was in elementary school we had an art class. They made us all make the same ASHTRAY. (I know UNBELIEVABLE right? - The levels of craziness in that project boggle the mind!)

We all had to compete with each other for grades based on who best followed directions. Our ashtray needed to look just like the one in the picture.

I wanted to make something else.

I took some clay home and made a naked lady.

My Mom found the naked lady. She told me I  was being led by the devil! Nothing further could have been from the truth.

I smooshed down my naked lady. I turned her into the creepy ashtray. Got a good grade.

The devil was happy.

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Create.

When you create you take the blinders off. You see the whole field. You render competition meaningless.

When you create you make your own rules. You always win. You are the only one in the game.

The purpose of martial arts is the elimination of ego. That’s what all arts do. They teach you to create and in the creation you discover your true power.

Instead, here in the West we’ve turned martial arts into a sport. A competition. A competition against others with strict rules. A place where people can go make the ego bigger. A place where they can build better ashtrays.

I prefer naked ladies.

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Students sometimes ask me why we don’t compete in tournaments.

I want to hit them with a stick.

I don’t.

But I DO think about it!